TONGUE PETALS 
April 2000
NAKED AND WITH VODKA
Well, Shunt has now been open to the public for an entire two years, sustaining a relatively stable population of 225 subscribers. Did I say stable? Excuse me, I meant to say steady, which is to say I meant constant. But what I really mean is... ok so yes, you're all pothouses but at least you hang around where Alan's concerned!
This anniversary is particularly exciting following the release of the new Recoil album, 'Liquid'. A poll indicated that most would celebrate naked, with vodka, and by unsubbing. Oh you Shuntese talk a lot of trash (about 100 or more posts a day of it) but you're all softies at heart. And people were even still talking about 'Liquid' until recently!
Petr re-reviewed 'Liquid' after one month while Hope reviewed it for the first time along with NYC and Cam. Petr also reviewed the 'Strange Hours' EP as well as Mark and Mike Lavey. Luca wondered what the next 'Liquid' single would be and compared Nine Inch Nails' 'The Fragile' to the new Recoil record. The EPK made KJ enthuse about it even more while Hope settled for scaring children with it.
Hope also forced Detroit radio to play 'Strange Hours' and Bernard plugged the new issue of his 'Sideline' magazine, complete with Recoil report. Shane wondered how we all felt about the LP a month after the release and Mark listed his obscure promo collection before going on to create a visual discography and FAQ for Recoil.
Some stranger Recoil related items: Raven wondered what kind of cheese Alan would be while future hubby Joe actually managed to link the GI Joe thread to Recoil itself. Cam wondered about Madonna as a collaborator and Lavey challenged critical Shuntese to make better music than 'Liquid'. Thomas asked about breathing samples on Nicole Blackman's tracks while Fox Puppy encouraged everyone to record their own version of 'Want'.
Mark jumped on Raven about offering to make CD-R copies of Recoil for a new member and Ooghna declared war on Alan naysayers. Hardy spotted 'Luscious Apparatus' drum loops on 'Don't Look Back', everybody enjoyed the 14 minute mix of 'Black Box' and CMoby thought that Alan looked like Bill Gates. We are left wondering why.
In Depeche related news: Henrik announced the Mute minidisk release of 'Violator' and the singles compilations while tut-tutting Moni B's take on 'Stripped' . Q reported that David Gahan might work with Trent Reznor.
Back on the Shunt front, Cam asked who the prettiest girl on Shunt was and KJ insulted various ethnic groups on demand. Sesame Street was discussed for ages as well as the ever recurring vinyl vs. CD debate. Farhan announced the web cast appearance of his band Edge To Life while Kim announced he and KJ's inclusion on 'Modified 5'. KJ posted the CharlieCon 1999 report + photos on her web site while demanding that Shuntese attend a similar event in 2000. Ken was asked by Mute USA to organize a release party in Chicago for Einsturzende Neubauten, giving him yet another opportunity to plug Plug Productions. KJ's polls revealed that Scorpio and Aquarius rule Shunt (or at least answer polls more readily) and that 'Strange Hours' is the overwhelming favourite track from 'Liquid'.
In the complete nonsense department, KJ again took the lead by wondering about Chinese pop and the presumed gayness of everything nowadays. Along with deriding NASA and declaring his masculine godliness for all to behold, Thomas wanted to kill teen music in the manner disco was murdered. Ubaldi then wondered if the American space program should be privatized.
CMoby pleaded the case for minidisks while Allison posted the details of the upcoming Twin Peaks convention. Dusty announced Edward Gorey's sad passing and Chris discussed the future of Napster. Everyone had something to say about New Order but most vocal (of course) were Mark and Micah. Ken informed Shunt musicians about Online Recording Studios while Raven was made miserable by the ease of getting a CD out these days. Zander asked everyone what tattoos they had and helpfully deciphered the hanky code.
Strange Shunt subject line of the month goes to Dusty, who asked "The Welsh are all mad, true?" Idle threat of the month goes to Thomas, who sneered, "My name is Inigo Montoya. You banned me from BONG."
Quote Of The Month was hard. It was between KJ's homosexual fork, Jen's evil clown, Ken's Hasidic Martin Gore, and of course, Fox Puppy. However, Fox Puppy wins for the first time ever with:

"Being Shunt's Susan Lucci scares me. Please, God, don't let that happen."
I hope you've enjoyed your two years of Shunt and I predict many Wilder, wackier years ahead of us with new faces and quotables, new Recoil records and of course, more Finnish folk, flames and fan parties. Excuse me while I go sob into a beer. How I love you guys!

Until next month, you've been tongued by,
Mike Daniella
Photography - Robert Mapplethorpe