TONGUE PETALS 
August 1998
DU HAAGENDAZ
Well, Shunt seems to have settled into a conversational pattern that has no rhyme, reason or rules - rejoice! We have fun and Alan and Recoil get a shout-out every now and then; it's like being in a coffee house where everybody likes the owner. And this month, everybody posted like they had a quadruple espresso with extra crystal meth. I don't even know where to begin!
As the Mad Hatter said, "Begin at the beginning and when you come to the end, stop." Sage advice when the topics you're trying to summarize do neither.

Jensenne started August off with some music recommendations which everybody joined in on to some degree. Dusty posthumed what Alan's disco dancing would be like (see Q+A) while Dominic threatened to kill us all, which I felt was a nice touch.
Duck and Adrian had a discussion about dressing for success and the cost to one's soul, Butterstump introduced himself with a bang and Andrew and Greg chattered about how much Delaware sucks (like that needs to be said). Stacey, Tracey, Kellie J. (sounds like a cheerleading squad, huh?), Sycamore and Krzysztof spoke about the aspirations and convictions of youth while Kelly Marie and Agent Orange bantered (or should I say 'cantered'?) about horses.
Everybody talked about David Lynch again and tattoos while everyone else (especially Ben) gave Vi a good natured hard time about moving to Oakland. K.J. defended it in her sort of unbalanced way.
Duck discussed his deep love of, and history with Erasure, while Sycamore composed a page designed to trash them. Julie, Dusty, KJ and Vi worshipped Curve and everybody panned the complete living hell out of 'For The Masses'. Stacey and Kryzsztof worshipped The The and nobody understood why.
Dusty tried to start a series of on-topic (i.e. about Alan) discussions which resulted in a series of enlightening, entertaining and totally off-topic explorations of hero worship, nostalgia, the future and the 80s. I'm excited to see where it goes next month. Perhaps you lurkers will add your two cents (or pence, or yen or whatever you use to pay for beer and porn, you sick little Shuntlings).
We somehow managed to fit Tab, Dairy Queen, corpses, music news, boy talk (illuminating to say the least), rumours and disdain for the new Depeche Mode material in the last week. Thanks to Agent Orange, Vi (come back soon!) Anthony, Brady, Henrik, Greg, KJ, & Dusty for keeping the last week as varied as the Pick-a-Mix bin at the Pathmark (I look forward to watching all you non-American Shunters try to figure out what the heck that means).
Greg Deola, that psycho from Capital City, USA, wins Quote Of The Month yet again because this actually made me go into the bathroom and check my boxers:


"I can see Cookie Monster holding up a choc-chipper and incessantly screaming 'Du hast!' at it."
Until next month, keep your shunts clean and try not to get subpoenaed by Kenneth Starr.

You've been tongued by:
Mike Daniella
Photography - Robert Mapplethorpe
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